I sit in the rocking chair I’ve had since my son (who heads to high school
this year) stirred inside of me. I’m thinking about the similarity between the
moments of birth and the moments of death.
Since the early eighties my work as a midwife has blessed me with being in
the presents of over 175 different births, all unique in their own way, all
individual experiences, and stories, all never before, never again little
human beings entering into our world. Yet I’ve noticed, in all there
differences they share a common thread. One I’ve heard hundreds and
hundreds of times from other people who have been at a birth with a loved
one, one which at times can be so powerful my body shakes trying to vent
what my mind and soul are trying to comprehend. I can only describe that
thread as being in the presence of pure love, the presence of God. At every
birth I’ve ever had the privilege to be at, that energy was there.
From birth to death, HUH ? If a question on a test asked for the opposite of
birth, I would write death, wouldn’t you ? How can opposites have
anything in common?
Four years ago I sat beside my mom as she lay on her death bed. I knew it
would only be a matter of days before she would be leaving me. I spent
what time I had left with her as productive as I could think of, I talked to
her constantly, I recalled our life together, how she took such great care of
me when I fractured my back at age 12, how much I love her and was so
thankful that she was my mom, what a great cook she was, how we took
care of each other when dad had a massive stroke, and how much I was
going to miss her in my life. Even though she never spoke to me I know
she heard me and was happy I was there. At 3:15 am her breathing slowed
to 2 breaths a minute, and I knew she was dying. I was beside her, the
room was dark and still, she opened her eyes (something she hadn’t done
in days) I asked her “mom can you see a light?” she shook her head yes,
“does the light feel good?” yes! I asked her to close her eyes and go be
with the light, and then BANG!!!! I realized that I recognized this energy in
the room, my mom didn’t take another breath, she was gone from me, and
I was left with this energy I clearly knew as the entity that I’ve felt at all
those births.
My mind, soul and heart struggled to absorb the beauty in the knowledge
of this, birth and death are the same, not opposites. An entrance of a
totally unique individual, into a new existence. Accompanied, guided by,
and very important to our Lord.
What a beautiful and soul resting discovery, what a great last gift from my
mom , to have been the mother that she was, allowed me to deeply love
her, thus allowing me to feel totally her transition from earth to the
presence of God.
I sit here now wondering if my mom knows of the last great blessing she
has bestowed on me, and somehow my soul smiles and assures me she
does.
Lisa Coomer CPM
One Last Gift
